.....is said to me hundreds of times a day. They are all into friends at this point, I'm told. Who's friends with who is the constant story from school. Who let who play with who, who has the power to sway others to their will. She practices on me: "I won't be your friend if you make me clear up, I won't be your friend if you don't let me wear that... "
"Fine," I say, "I'm not your friend, I'm your mummy."
This felt a bit strange at first but now I can say it with gusto. Since I will be about eighty when she is a teenager there isn't much chance I'll ever be one of those mothers who says they are more like friends with their daughters. More like grandmas in my case.
It threw her a bit to begin with, me not wanting to be her friend. They all want to have as many friends as possible at school, I suppose- it's just like facebook and linked in. They haven't evolved to the point where one actually considers it a healthy thing to prune the list being entered into a new address book.
Since then she's diverted to new tactics:
"I won't let you come to my party if you won't let me stay in the bath longer."
That one always makes me laugh, and she gets cross and asks me why I'm laughing.
"Who is going to organise your party if I'm not allowed?" Pause while she considers this.
" You won't be my mummy friend if you don't let me stay in the bath longer."
I haven't thought up my reply to this one yet, and life's too short not to have five more minutes in
the bath. And mummy- friend seems quite a nice balance somehow.