When I picked up X today her minder chortled that the children in her care regularly give away more than their parents might want them to about the impolite habits at home. For a moment I was really worried about what she was going to say, given that last night X (totally unfairly, I might add ) accused me of doing a poo in the bath. X is obsessed with me pooing and insists on standing behind me and watching when it comes out. This, I suppose, is her anal phase, as described by Freud, and is therefore probably entirely healthy and normal but it puts me off a bit, especially when she jumps up and down excitedly and shouts 'it's coming out now!' and gives me updates on length and colour. Anyway, I was relieved when the minder's accusation was teaching our children the impolite habit of talking on our mobiles at the table, imitating their parents nattering in imaginary phones while they have their tea. I have a feeling this accusation is being directed entirely at me. X does a great imitation of me on the phone-it's scary how well she gets my snappy tone: 'yup?' and 'bye, bye, bye, bye' why do I do this- isn't one bye enough? It probably adds at least a quid to my bill each month. Note to self: must stop talking on the mobile on the loo as this may also be copied and judged by the minder.
On the way home X started singing. She's just discovered how enjoyable singing can be and, since sunday, has started making up her own little songs. I've have much hope that, one day, they may become tuneful. Today however she was back to her old favourite: twinkle twinkle, except this time the words have been changed , in a way which I know is way beyond X's rhyming abilities:' twinkle twinkle little star,
mummy drives a rusty car.'
Hmmm, Mrs Minder, this giving thing away thing is a two way street. And ok, it's not a smart people carrier like your car and it might be twenty years old and (what with childcare costs) doesn't look like being replaced anytime soon- but there isn't a scrap of rust on it!
Hey X, lets learn a new song together: 'Old mother hubbard lived in a shoe
She had so many children
She got herself a brand new people carrier in blue'